Ladybugs

And now to part 3: "I Am a Ladybug," from circa June 1987.

From Stories By Mrs. Thompson's First Grade Class

Again we have the ad nauseum repeated details: I have a red body and black spots, I have black spots, we are red-orange with black spots, I am an insect, I am shiny, I am nice, I like to fly, I like aphids, I, I, I I I me me me.

But some notable departures:

"I like you very, very much."

"I am chubby and nice."
Here we go with the personals ads again.

A mini-epic: "He went on an adventure to find gold. He went past high mountains. He found the mine. He looked for gold. He found gold. He brought gold back to his family. They felt happy."
Aww, but were they happy? Is gold the key to happiness, young one?

The autobiographical: "This morning I saw something that I have never seen before. It was something new to me. I was so scared. So I ran to my mom and dad. They did not believe me. So they spanked me. I cried all the way to my room."
Awwww.

The autobiographical projection: "One day when I went to school, I met a police man. His name was Mr. Kilpatrick. He was very nice. He said, "I am going to arrest your teacher.""
Hahahaha! Hope you didn't get an F for this one.

Conflict resolution: " I saw some aphids and then a greedy ladybug came. It ate all the aphids. It said, "Do you want a fight?" I was scared and I saw some aphids. I said, "Do you want to share?" "Yes," and we did and I flew home."
Well done.

The almost cool: "One day I saw something in front of me. I was very scared. I thought it was something from outer space. It had two things on its head. But it was not something from outer space. It was a bear."
Agg, almost there!

And once again, the cavalcade of ladybug names: Gilbirt (again?! really??), Freddy, Blazer, Tornado, Sparkler, Charles, Shiny, Dottie, Dot, Spotty, Joe, Tony, Ray, Harry Scarry Pot and Mot, Rad, Sandy, Windy, Happy, Messy, Spots, Lady, George, Lupe, Cloudy, Spotty, and Charlie.

And, once again, little Gordon's story starts out in an ordinary enough fashion: "I am a ladybug. I am red with black spots."

Here, we may conjecture, is where all the rigid requirements have been fulfilled. Next comes: "Once upon a time there was a bad witch Ladybug." ...and the adventure begins. Here it is its entirety, again with corrections from the original manuscript.


Along with a couple of illustrations:

the bad witch ladybug's castle

prisoner of the bad witch ladybug

I Am the Easter Bunny

...And now part 2.

After six months, it is of dubious obviousness how far the writing skills of Mrs. Thompson's first graders have advanced since "A Witch" (see previous post). This time around, the exercise is exactly the same, only it opens with "I Am the Easter Bunny," and the stories which some students plaigarize include Peter Rabbit and some generic story about the Easter Bunny almost not delivering his eggs on time.

From Stories By Mrs. Thompson's First Grade Class

Dime-a-dozen short stories from students include Easter Bunnies extemporizing at length about how they are white, furry, fat, fast, nice, happy, love children, and must deliver X many eggs by Y day. Some of the more tense, gripping versions include the following:

"I got caught. I got saved. I was happy."
Phew!

"One night it was very dark and I couldn't see. And that night I ran into a tree and broke all of the eggs. That morning the children were very sad and were mad all day and didn't like Easter any more."
Oooh damn. This Easter Bunny is fired.

"One day I had to deliver a chocolate bunny. My eyes started to water. I had to eat it. But I couldn't eat it. Finally I delivered it. I was happy I did not eat it."
And that's how the Easter Bunny learned maturity.

"I live in Bunny Town. Do you like my eggs? I like Easter. Do you like Easter? I do like Easter. It is fun. Some of my eggs break."
Bunny ADHD.

"I saw a crab, it pinched me so I had to give it an egg."
Conflict and resolution.

Bunny names are predictably suitably bunny-y: Floppy, Hoppy, Gilbert (again??), Spotty, Fluffy, Swifty, Floppy, Easter, Fluffy, Heather, Easter, Gilbert, Smarty, and Fluffy.

Meanwhile, let's look at what little Gordon has written...

"I am the Easter Bunny. I have pink ears and whiskers that are droopy. I have a long fluffy tail."

So far, so good. But then:

"My name is Rainbow Egg."

The first sign that something may be amiss! Next...

"One day on Easter Eve I hopped to the planet Jupiter."

YESSSS!!!

I'll let you see the read the rest yourself. It includes a space monster and linguistic difficulties with space monster language.

From Stories By Mrs. Thompson's First Grade Class

The corrections are from the actual handwritten manuscript. I'm severely disappointed, in retrospect, at whoever transcribed the stories and didn't pay enough attention to distinguish one space monster from many, one easter egg from many, and monster language from space monster language.

Stories By Mrs. Thompson's First Grade Class

Whilst digging through old boxes at home, I've rediscovered some priceless childhood treasures, which incidentally prove that I've been a bit weird since way back when. Among the earliest of these juvenilia is the series Stories By Mrs. Thompson's First Grade Class, including I Am a Penguin, (I Am) A Witch, I Am the Easter Bunny, and the culminating masterpiece I Am a Ladybug.

The exercise is simple and formulaic: starting with "I am a ____," kids write (actually dictate, most likely) a biographical short story, including many prompted elements such as what the hero(ine) likes / doesn't like, where (s)he lives, what his/her name is, what (s)he looks like, etc. It also appears that example stories were read to the class beforehand, resulting in some similar plot threads throughout (such as the Peter Rabbit references in the Easter Bunny collection).

But anyhow, on to the stories. The first is A Witch, from Halloween-time 1986.

From Stories By Mrs. Thompson's First Grade Class

Most stories get an 'A' for Automaton; they are predictable to a T. Witches named Witchy-Witch are black. They have black cats. They fly. They have brooms. They make potions. They are mean. They are green. But occasionally there are amusing bits that stand out. For example, there are those that resemble personals ads:

"I can cook. I'm angry. I look funny."

"I can cast a spell. I can cook. I can melt."
(As in, transitively melting cheese?)

Then there are the conflicted witches:

"I hate witches. I am green. I have a black cat. I like witches."
Ok, this boy gets a B.

"I hate you. I do bad things. I am a bad witch. I have a black cat. My friends hate me."
We might want to refer this budding young author to a school counselor.

Then there is the cavalcade of names. Oh how amusing, the appellations appellated by children! (Imagine if we let children choose their own names.) For the witches, names run the gamut from the mundane: Fred, Brad, Elizabeth, Kerry, Ned, Amy, Hazel, Brad, and Kit; to the descriptive: Monster, Potion-Lady, Spooky, Crackels, Witch-A-Boo, Witchy, Spooky, McBoo, Spooky, Witchy Wash, Witchy Witch, and Witch-Witch; then there are the puzzling/interesting: Nail, Lizard, Moon, Lizard Brain (a trend!), and Snakes; and the bizarre: Boob (?!), Shu-Shu, and my contribution, MOONTER THEIS.

Read a few stories below:

From Stories By Mrs. Thompson's First Grade Class

Moonter Theis wins!!